Dads, Towels and Toothbrushes
Daddy did you use my brush again ? ‘ I asked angrily as he was busy reading the days newspaper sipping a cup of fresh hot coffee . ‘ Everyone else is asleep , and among the five inside , only my toothbrush is wet !’ Dad moved the paper down , looked at me , smiled and went back to reading without saying a word . How irritating , how disgusting . Come on Daddy, can’t you even remember your own stuff ? How do I brush now ? ‘ Simple beta ( son ) , just wash it with hot water , and reuse it . I did brush this morning , but I can’t say for certain which brush I used !! ‘ And as I looked at him angrily wanting to tear apart that newspaper that he was reading , he lowered it and said ‘ God bless you beta ‘ and went back to reading as if nothing happened .
I must have been 8 or 9 then . Atleast that day he helped me get some hot water by putting the immersion heater on , something that I and my two elder brothers were banned from operating as it could cause an electric shock if not used the correct way . The bucket had to be filled with water to a certain level , and the heating rod had to be suspended on a clothes hanger which was longer than than the diameter of the bucket, with the rod submerged within a certain limit – not too much, not too little . I washed the brush with almost boiling hot water for about 5 minutes before putting it to my teeth . And after I had a quick shower , again I realised dad had messed up big time – he had already used my towel . He had no clue where his towel was . ‘ Daddy this is too much , how can you falter with both the brush and the towel . Atleast one you should have used your own . Now how can I dry myself ‘ ‘ The towel will still work beta , just use it . If not, find mine and feel free to use it , it will surely be dry ‘ ‘ Yeah right , and that way you can find out where your lost towel is , how smart ‘
I used to get very irritated with dads casual approach to towels and toothbrushes . One day it was mine . Another day it would be mamma’s , and another day it would be my brothers’ . Rarely would he get his brush right . Dad was the chief surgeon in the hospital, had quite a safe pair of hands , and was well-known in the city for his surgeries . But inspite of all that , when it comes to bathroom etiquette , in my eyes he was a total failure . I would always wonder how a surgeon could manage to be so forgetful. I had resolved , whenever I grew up and had a family of my own , never to irritate my kids by using their stuff . Everytime I complained to mom at the dining table about dads mix ups with the children’s stuff , there would be back and forth arguments for a short while , I would be fuming , dad would be smiling and almost everytime the conversation ended with dad’s wide grin and his standard statement ‘ God bless you beta ‘
Its been three decades since then . I now have a family of my own , three kids . We don’t use an immersion heater at home but a geyser . Anyone can operate it , all it needs is a switch to be turned on or off . I was a morning newspaper addict till about 7-8 years ago, while now I read most of the news on my phone . I haven’t had the newspaper delivered home for almost a decade . And recently, as I was busy reading the news on the phone, my 10 year old J asked me ‘ Papa, did you use my brush . It’s wet . Only you and me are awake , and yours is dry ‘ I looked up from the phone , said ‘sorry , I did brush my teeth , but I can’t say for sure which one I used beta ‘ ‘ Oh papa how irritating . How can you even mess up your toothbrush . Can’t you remember which is whose ? ‘ It’s ok son, just put the geyser on, wash it with hot water and use it . It’s not really a big deal ‘ It’s easy for me to say it now, but back in my primary school days I used to get mighty upset with dads activities .
Thankfully, the wife got me a different coloured toothbrush so that i don’t get mixed up . It has worked . I have been able to keep the resolution I made as a kid not to irritate my children with toothbrushes and towels . Err … Hmmm .. not so much the latter . The former , largely yes because a black and golden toothbrush easily stands out from a pack of white ones , but towels I still mess up with . I grab the first one that I see. Whether it’s mine or someone else’s doesn’t really matter . I’m working on this , but have repeatedly been failing !
I wish I could ask dad how granddad was with his towel and toothbrush . I wonder if all married men with kids have this problem, or if this is unique in our family . Unfortunately I lost dad 3 years ago to a heart attack, and grandpa too is no more , and so this will remain a mystery .
I’m a surgeon too , and somehow remembering the steps of a surgery and what to do while operating is much easier than remembering my towel it’s colour or its make . I struggle with it . J was recently vociferously complaining at the dining table ‘ Papa’s messing with my towel all the time mamma . How can he not know which is his . I don’t like to use a wet towel ‘ My wife smiled , and said ‘ You can use it beta , it will still work . Or you find Papa’s towel and use it ‘ ‘ Yeah right , and find him his lost towel while he uses mine all the time . Why do you do this papa . ‘ Well I can’t really answer that J, because I honestly don’t know the answer . It just happens I guess …’ ‘ If grandpa was alive , I would have asked him to scold you and .. ‘ I interrupted –
‘ If grandpa was alive I would have apologised to him whole-heartedly J ‘
Oh and what about me ? ‘
With a wide grin I said ‘ Well all that I would say to you is ‘ God bless you beta ‘ !!!